Friday, April 16, 2010
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One of the hardest thing that a parent can go through. We lost our 13 year old son in a boating accident. I encourage anyone to share their story about losing a loved one, their stuggle and journey. Their lessons learned about life, death, philosophy, religious views, spirituality, and memories. I hope you enjoy reading the tabbed selections: random thoughts, emails, & poems. ~ Thanks, Sharon
Blessed to have you for 13 wonderful years
Steve went Home with God, on Thursday, August 23rd, 2007. He was the beloved son of Sharon & Tom Doberstein, Brother to Alicia and Meghan Doberstein. He is survived and loved by many relatives, special friends: Tyler and Ross, Sensei Mark Weinberg and the Karate Family, and hundreds of special friends.
Steve Doberstein
"DOBIE"
Our Story
It was a warm and beautiful Thursday afternoon, on August 23rd, 2007. We were on vacation, at my sister- in-laws lake cottage with our family, our new AFS student from Italy, and two of the kids friends. After lunch we loaded up the family to take turns tubing around Pearl Lake for an afternoon of fun. Alicia and Steve each had their own tube and were having a blast being pulled around the lake.. The boat waves got a little choppy and all of a sudden Steve's tube went towards shore and hit a floating wooden raft. Thankfully, Alicia's tube went the other way. Steve hit the raft head on, and died instantly, he didn't suffer any pain. And our greif story of losing a son begins...
My Story
I recall the first 12 hours and having the taunting task of telephoning and emailing friends and family about what happened. I think I was still in shock and felt completly empty. I know I was breathing, and blood was pumping through my veins, and that's all I knew, other than that I had no feelings and emotions. I was reading email responses at 3:00a.m because I couldn't sleep. I was dumbfounded when a friend seriously and sincerely asked, How I was? I pondered for about 15 minutes, wondering if I could feel an emotion. Then, I realized I felt empathy, because I didn't just lose a son, so did my husband, children, family, friends, and community. I realized this was the grief journey of many, and we all had to survive it.
I started a series of long emails to a large group of friends that first year to let eveyone know how we were coping. The emails opened up communication on a subject that noone talks about or understands.
Within six months of Steve's death, I started sharing my story at MATC for a class called, Death & Dying. I continue to be a guest speaker, on losing a child, and what it feels like, after death communication, and so much more.
I encourage anyone to share your stories. This blog is open to write your stories and memories, your religious views, spirituality, after death communication, thoughts on death. It's our journey to remember and learn...
I also wish to share with you the additional tabbed pages: Random Thoughts, Email Communication during the first year, and Steve's Poems.
Please feel free to share your thoughts and comments, I started this blog to help and learn. Blessings to you!
I started a series of long emails to a large group of friends that first year to let eveyone know how we were coping. The emails opened up communication on a subject that noone talks about or understands.
Within six months of Steve's death, I started sharing my story at MATC for a class called, Death & Dying. I continue to be a guest speaker, on losing a child, and what it feels like, after death communication, and so much more.
I encourage anyone to share your stories. This blog is open to write your stories and memories, your religious views, spirituality, after death communication, thoughts on death. It's our journey to remember and learn...
I also wish to share with you the additional tabbed pages: Random Thoughts, Email Communication during the first year, and Steve's Poems.
Please feel free to share your thoughts and comments, I started this blog to help and learn. Blessings to you!
Followers
About Me
- Sharon Doberstein
- Wisconsin, United States
I added a very special Christmas Story to "The Random Thoughts" Tab. It's accented in Red & Green if you want to read it. This story is true "Random Act of Kindness" that I've ever experienced. I hope you find truly inspiring!!!!
ReplyDeleteMrs Doberstein, I think this website is a wonderful idea. We all miss Steven and this is a genuine way to show it. Thank you for making it.
ReplyDeleteTom and I did High Interest Day at Jefferson Elementary today. (05/14/10) It's still not the same without you. I recall, asking you to help us with the cake decorating sessions all day, and just in case you would pack up your Karate uniform and bring it along. Sure enough, Sensei Weinberg asked you to help teach his Karate sessions for Black Belt Leadership Academy (BBLA). Your theory paid off for two years, Sensei Winberg loved the help. BBLA still does the Karate sessions, and no one has ever helped since then. All the Teacher's love you and miss you!!!
ReplyDeleteIt's your Birthday today, you would be 17 today! Wow! A senior at Tosa East! I worked today and a customer approached me and said she was sad today because she's still crying and going to the cemetery to visit her husband everyday for the past 3 months. I said it's normal to cry every day. After six months, things might change, you might find the crying isn't so frequent. I told her to start to appreciate the little things, since she knows what it's like to feel empty. You feel more grateful and appreciate, and see the beauty in things, if you open your eyes! The customer had a quizing gaze, and I told her, "it's my son's Birthday, he died when he was 13." She cried for me and gave me a hug, and I was trying to comfort her. Why? Why - do I experience that losing a child weighs more on the heart than a spouse or a parent? Why - do I get more sympathy and comfort for losing a child? Has anyone else experienced that?
ReplyDelete